- Red face
- Huffing and/or Puffing
- Gnashing of teeth
- And (most notably) sudden outbursts of the phrase "You're not coming to my birthday party!" Most disturbingly, flare-ups typically occur months away from the child's next birthday party, leaving parents flummoxed while attempting to maintain a current invite list.
The best way to combat yourenotcomingtomybirthdaypartyitis is to confuse the infected child by responding randomly to their uninvited demands. For example, this morning I asked Noah to cross the street with me while walking Sam to school. A normal request, I thought, given that he would otherwise be smooshed by an oncoming wall of traffic. With "You're not coming to my birthday party!" busting forth, I informed him that I was in charge of his birthday party this year and would no longer be ordering dancing llamas. A lie? Perhaps, but by his perplexed stare I could tell that Noah was indeed reconsidering his disinvitation. And that, my friends, is what you call a medical breakthrough.